Definitions
by At A Venture
Summary: Sookie & Amelia. Sookie defines the "gracious plenty".


_A/N: This short one-shot is dedicated to the girls on the Wiki :) Enjoy!_

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**Definitions**

"Okay, so tell me," I grinned, handing Sookie the bowl of popcorn.

"Tell you what?" She stared at me incredulously, as if I'd just asked her to name the capitals of ancient Mesopotamia.

Okay, so I'd sprung the question somewhat randomly, I admit it. But we'd just finished watching Sex and the City, and obviously sex was on the brain. You didn't have to be a telepath to know Sookie and I were both thinkin' about nookie with our respective supernatural boyfriends.

"Tell me what he's like in the sack, silly!" I giggled.

"What?!" Sookie blushed six shades of red. "No way!"

"Come on, Sook! This is what girlfriends are for! We gossip about sex!" Surely I wasn't the first friend to mention it. I mean, Sook used to be pals with Arlene.

"That's private, Amelia!" She glared at me like I was some kind of pervert.

"Oh good grief," I crossed my arms over my chest. "It's not like he's going to know. Just spill the beans! Is he well-endowed?"

"Amelia!" She gasped but flushed so red that her cheeks were actually glowing.

"That answers that question," I grinned. "How well? Like…eight inches? Nine?"

Sookie fumbled over the question, trying to decide whether or not to answer me. She played with the popcorn in the bowl, looked at the floor, pulled at her shirt sleeve, and finally spoke up.

"He's uh…it's uh…" I was totally wearing her down.

"Yeeeeessssssss?" I prompted her.

"It's a gracious plenty," she breathed. It was almost impossible to hear her. I was practically leaning in her lap.

"Uh." I blinked. "Okay. What does that mean?"

"What do you mean what does that mean?" Sookie stared at me blankly.

"Well, okay, every girl is shaped differently, you know? So what's plenty?" I gathered she hadn't gotten out a ruler and measured it. "I mean, if you had to eyeball it?"

Sookie looked at me, then sort of closed her eyes. I watched her curiously. Maybe this _was _the first conversation she'd ever had about sex that wasn't with the one she was sexing. How weird. After a couple minutes, she held her hands up, her index fingers extended. She was blushing still, and her lips were flat and pursed together in an expression that achieved both embarrassment and frustration at having to imagine Eric's endowment when it wasn't in front of her. It was a little weird. She held her fingers about, oh, nine inches apart, which was certainly impressive.

"Okay, now for the kicker. How big around?" I grinned, nudging her in the arm with my elbow.

"Why does that matter?" Sookie gasped. I raised an eyebrow at her, arching it clearly so she could really get the gist of it.

"Sookie, how many guys have you slept with?"

"Three!" She squeaked, as if that were an impressive and frankly astonishing number. I tried not to snicker. Difficult. Really difficult.

"Haven't you noticed that girth is a pretty important feature?"

"Um," she answered.

"Well, it is. Just trust me on this one." I got up and grabbed some bottles and cans from the kitchen sink where we collected our recycling. I set a beer bottle, a Coke can, and a 20 ounce plastic soda bottle on the coffee table. Then I got up again to grab a couple more examples of endowment. I set a Sharpie marker and a prescription pill bottle on the table as well.

"What's all this for?" She pointed at the collection of items.

"Which one of these best resembles this girth?" I asked plainly.

Sookie examined the collection in earnest. I gulped, praying to the goddess that she wouldn't pick up that damn Sharpie. Finally, she picked up the Coke can and handed it to me. She was still blushing, but she'd found some embarrassed giggles too and she let them free.

"But he's much longer than that," she added, pointing to the can. "More like the Coke bottle, but a little more,"

"Well, shit," I laughed. "That's definitely plenty!"

"Bill was more like that," Sook pointed to the Rolling Rock bottle on the table. Apparently I'd worn her all the way down. She was sharing on her own. It was a whole new Sookie Stackhouse!

"But a little shorter."

"Not bad," I nodded thoughtfully. She'd certainly traded in her old model for something exceptionally better. Of course, she hadn't mentioned Quinn.

"He was intimidating," she frowned. She'd read my mind. Oh Lordy!

"Like really intimidating?" I blinked in awe. If Eric was "gracious", what the heck was "intimidating"?

"He was like…like the bottle of wine we had last night." Sookie shivered a little.

"Great Goddess," I whispered, partially in awe. I mean, I was sleeping with a were myself, but Tray wasn't a bottle of wine. He was closer to Sookie's definition of "plenty."

"I'm kinda glad we only slept together the one time,"

"Yeah, I could see that…" I shuddered a little myself.

There's a fine line between just enough and "Holy Goddess, get that away from me!" Apparently, Sookie Stackhouse had crossed it, and she wasn't going back either. I stuck some more popcorn in my mouth and munched thoughtfully.

"You wanna watch another movie?" Sookie murmured. She was glancing at the clock on the DVD player. It was a good few hours until sunset.

"Sure. Have you ever seen Dangerous Liasons?" I mean, heck, we had a theme going.

"No…what's it about?"

"It's a…a documentary," I said. I went upstairs to grab the DVD from my room.


End file.
